A bisexual male monologue

As a bisexual, I often find people confused about what bisexuality really is, which naturally leads to all kinds of questions. In my experience, this confusion is understandable, but many of the questions raised out of curiosity are wildly inappropriate in time, place and manner.



In this case, I'm reluctant to engage in conversation. That doesn't mean that I'm reluctant to engage in these discussions and ultimately answer these questions, but that I, like others, want to feel comfortable in the context of discussing them.



During Bi visibility month, I wanted to make some of these issues public to help understand the source of the confusion and do my best to alleviate some of the confusion.



So, I asked people to ask me their questions. I received these questions through social media; Please understand that these answers are my own and only reflect my experience and opinions as a bi person. I encourage other bi people to share their own answers!



Where do you feel most comfortable (gay or straight)?


I feel comfortable in both places, but it really depends on my plans for the evening. For example, I wouldn't do or say something that I would do or say in a straight bar, or vice versa. I don't think it's "" posturing" "in any situation, but understanding the environment and reacting to it in a way that feels most comfortable to me. Acceptance in these two types of bars is problematic and can be improved, but luckily I feel equally comfortable in two Spaces.



The stigma of seeing a date as bisexual is widespread in both communities, isn't it difficult?

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Of course, especially when it comes to gay men. In general, they seem to have the greatest dissatisfaction with bisexuality because they see it as a phase rather than a legitimate sexual orientation. In addition, there are those relationships where I express concern that bi individuals can't be faithful because they attract more than one gender, which is especially frustrating because it depicts the lack of moral features such as honesty and integrity.



What if someone says you can't be bisexual and you can only be heterosexual or homosexual?


I said, no matter who I'm with (if I'm with anyone), I'm still who I was. In my opinion, the logic of your partner deciding your sexual orientation is inherently flawed. Plus, I wouldn't choose a partner whose mind is so closed that they think there are only two ways to express sexual orientation.



How do you know you're bisexual?


In a way, I knew I was attracted to men and women from an early age, probably around eight or nine years old. However, I didn't know what bisexuality was; I sincerely believe that it has to be one of those or another that has led to years of confusion for me. Through the punch line of a joke, I finally learned that bisexuality is a legitimate orientation; It's not an ideal way to find it, but it does motivate me to start looking for resources and answers. I have to say, it wasn't until my college years that I fully accepted that I was bisexual.



Are bisexual men facing shame that gay men don't?


I believe we face many of the same stains from people outside of the LGBTQ+ community, but within this community, things are completely different. I found that as a bisexual, I was often accused and told that I was ineffective. I was told that I was a victim of the LGBTQ+ community, of people who "" really came forward." " "We're often ignored or told we're wrong, and in a community that should be accepted, it's a very frustrating experience."



What is your biggest misconception as a bi person?


What I want to say is that I often face three kinds of bi misconceptions:



Bisexuality is ineffective, and I'm confused or in a phase


Bisexual individuals cannot be in a committed, monogamous relationship


There is no fixed percentage or number to measure whether you are "straight or gay"


Do some bisexuals only like to have sex with one gender?


I do think that some people who are bisexual may be attracted to one gender, but emotionally they are attracted to more than one gender. I'm sure it will depend on how you view attraction and relationships, but personally, I wouldn't have any opinion on such a person who identifies as bi.
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